What I find interesting about Saul’s conversion experience is that Luke spends almost as much time writing about Ananias (Acts 9:10-17) as he does Saul (Acts 9:1-9, 18-19). Ananias had an important role to play as the agent through whom God healed and commissioned Saul. But Ananias hesitated to accept that role (Acts 9:13-14). Of course, no one can really blame him for questioning the sincerity of Saul’s conversion. He had a reputation for being ruthless as he himself would testify in his letters (Gal. 1:13).
Keeping in mind the saints in Scripture who have hesitated to accept God’s mission (i.e., Moses, Gideon, Jeremiah, Peter), Ananias seems to be in good company. It probably isn’t farfetched to suggest that if we aren’t experiencing some level of hesitation in our obedience to God, there is a good chance we have minimized or disregarded His commandments. God’s call upon us usually takes us out of our comfort zones.
At the same time, unchecked hesitation can lead to paralyzation and the swift judgment of God (i.e., Lot’s wife, Israelite spies who gave a bad report about the Promised Land, and those who wanted to delay discipleship Luke 9:59-62, cf Matt. 8:19-22). While hesitation is understandable, and probably indicative of doing something beyond our natural inclinations, we must learn to overcome our reluctance by trusting that God will provide the strength to obey.
Have you allowed your hesitation to turn into paralyzation when it comes to fulfilling the Great Commission? Ananias questioned Saul’s authenticity, but once the Lord made his purposes for Saul clear to Ananias we read, “So Ananias departed and entered the house. And laying his hands on him he said, ‘Brother Saul…’” (Acts 9:17).